Step Aside Morning Shed, Turn Your Nighttime Routine Into The Perfect Self Care Ritual

For as long as I can remember, I’ve been a night owl–even as a child, I preferred staying up late at night over getting up early in the morning. And so it makes sense that I’ve never been particularly drawn to any self-care rituals that require me to set my alarm any early. This is not all to say that I shirk a self-care routine entirely: I apply my skincare with religious devotion and I revel in primping whether it’s my hair, my nails, or my skin. I just choose to luxuriate in these rituals at night, before bed.

Still, in this day and age, it can feel like if you’re not doing something exactly the way you see it trending on social media, there’s something wrong. But as someone who doesn’t feel entirely myself until noon, waking up early in the name of self-care is pretty plainly counterintuitive. It’s hard to reconcile my body’s own natural rhythm with the ubiquitous messaging that, particularly as women, we should be maximizing the hours we spend sleeping to improve our appearance and wellbeing.

Perfection Is The Enemy Of The Good

Social media is rife with ‘Get Ready With Me’ or ‘Wake Up With Me’ style videos that document content creator’s morning routines. “How does one find time to train for a marathon, make the perfect matcha latte, cook a full protein-filled breakfast, and journal the most poetic prose of their manifestations all before 9 a.m.?” Audrey Noble writes for Vogue. In the quest for aesthetic optimization, it often feels like we have lost the plot: we seem to spend more hours covered in creams and hooked up to devices than we do out in the world showing off these supposed improvements.

And inevitably, it’s hard to conclude this is all a net positive for our overall wellbeing. In an interview with Vogue about the viral morning shed trend, Psychologist Dr. Emily Green says the obsession with a perfect routine has the potential to spiral out of control. “If folks adopting this trend come to feel that they must adhere to every step in a certain order, or can’t be flexible with the routine even if a given context makes it unworkable (e.g., you get home late or have an impromptu sleepover), it has the potential to create a lot of distress and start interfering with making the best overall choices in other parts of your life,” she says.

That’s not to say that these routines don’t have their benefits–to be sure, they do. A skincare regiment for example, can have mental health benefits; it provides stability and consistency in your day–it even allows for a respite from the chaos of day to day life. In fact plenty of popular tips have their advantages: sleep masks, which block light, can improve the quality of your sleep, for example.

Feeling your best at home can be just as impactful for your overall well-being and mental health as what you do when you go out, and increasingly, brands are creating loungewear and sleepwear to meet that market. “We hear from our community all the time that feeling good at home is just as important as feeling good when you step out. What you wear can really influence your mindset, even at the end of the day,” Jennifer Foyle President & Executive Creative Director of Aerie tells me via email. “That is why we focus on creating matching sets and versatile pieces that feel effortless, yet still put together. As sleepwear becomes more part of everyday style, it allows our customer to carry that sense of confidence and ease with them throughout every part of their routine.”

The bottom line? The best self-care routine isn’t the longest or the one you do earliest in the morning; it’s not the routine with the most products or the priciest gadgets. It’s the one that makes you feel the best.

Night Owls Unite

If, like me, you’re partial to an indulgent bedtime routine, you’re in luck: research shows that everything from reading before bed to investing in quality cotton sheets can improve your sleep health.

Even your nighttime skincare routine can be psychologically beneficial and some skincare steps prove more effective when applied at night. Take retinol, for example: in an interview with the Financial Times, Dr Anjali Mahto, a consultant dermatologist said, “Exposure to sunlight can degrade [retinol], reducing its effectiveness and increasing the risk of skin irritation. At night, away from UV exposure, retinol can penetrate the skin and promote cell turnover more effectively.”

Plenty of skincare products are gentle enough to use twice a day (if not more) – Tower28’s SOS Spray and Dieux’s Instant Angel Moisturizer, for example, calms skin, and reduces irritation and can be used with other skincare or alone so it’s perfect to use to soothe skin before bed, and throughout the day. Other products provide values unique to overnight use; for example, Soft Services’ Theraplush Overnight Repair Treatment is a moisturizing retinol treatment for hands that is designed to apply before bed. Likewise, lip masks designed to be worn overnight can provide improved hydration and comfort over daytime treatments. Even nourishing lip balms like Chanel’s Hydra Beauty Lip Care, Summer Fridays’ Lip Butter Balm, and Dr. Idriss’ Barrier Baste Moisturizing Lip Balm are perfect for overnight use; if you have sensitive skin or prefer to forgo fragrance, Cocokind’s formula will be just right for you.

I find that one of the most effective ways to create a nighttime routine that is effective and also feels luxurious is to have designated nighttime versions of common products; I have scrunchies and hair clips that I only wear in bed, I have reading glasses that only ever sit on my bedside table; I have a notepad and pencil next to my bed that I only use to jot down late night or last minute reminders. You can even keep your nighttime essentials on a designated tray or on your bedside table.

I also swear by a nighttime-specific fragrance. Every woman in my family has a fragrance they wear that’s unique to bedtime–it’s the ultimate luxury, and nothing makes me feel more glamorous than a few spritzes before I get in bed. Typically, I’d recommend opting for a scent profile that’s distinct from your day to day fragrances. In general, at night I tend to prefer gourmands like Summer Fridays’ Sunlit Vanilla, Phlur’s Heavy Cream, or Tocca’s Laila; they feel warm and more apropos for evening and sleep. And to really maximize the cozy fragrance effect, a linen spray like DedCool’s Mochi Milk is perfect. You can even layer a gourmand fragrance with a lotion like Light Lacquer’s new Amber Hour Nourishing Hand Cream, Noyz’s Only Human fragrance milk or the gourmand holy grail that is Bath & Body Works’ Warm Vanilla Sugar. And it’s not just about smelling pretty–research shows that fragrance can help trigger emotional responses in the brain; having a fragrance that I only ever smell before bed helps my body settle into sleep mode.

Now it’s time to actually get in bed. In addition, choosing textiles, furniture, and decor that feels true to your taste helps turn your bedroom into a refuge. For decorative pillows, quilts, and canopies, Projektityyny, a Nordic brand based in the UK, creates whimsical, unique pieces (that also double as phenomenal gifts.)

And for a truly luxurious sleep requires two critical elements: quality sleepwear and sheets. Experts recommend bedding made from natural fibers like 100% cotton or linen like the percale sheets and cotton quilts from Rifle Paper Co. made in collaboration with The Company Store. The collection was designed to make the simple but essential act of getting into bed at night special. “We always say Rifle Paper Co. exists to ‘bring beauty to the everyday.’ To me, it makes sense that this idea would extend to our bedrooms and bathrooms—the environments where so much of our lives take place.” Anna Bond, Rifle Paper Co. Co-Founder, CEO & CCO tells me via email. “To fill these spaces with things that bring you joy is like a little gift to yourself, especially when they’re the first thing you see in the morning, or the place you retreat after a long day. I love that this collection can serve that small but mighty role in customers’ lives.”

The Company Store’s reputation for quality is what drew Bond to work with the brand; she knew it would allow Rifle Paper Co. to have fun with patterns, quilting, and other design details. And building the perfect bed, for her, is personal. “I love a cozy bed with lots of layers and I use our products: the sateen sheets, duvet cover, and quilt,” she tells me. “My husband makes the bed every day and it is a highlight getting into a beautiful, comfortable bed after a long day of working and being a mom.”

Last but certainly not least, what you actually put on your body to sleep in is critical. And it will vary, of course; do you prefer pajamas or a nightgown? Do you sleep hot or cool? The one sleepwear nonnegotiable that applies across the board though is you want what you sleep in to be comfortable. For a little bit of everything that won’t break the bank, you can’t go wrong with Aerie with their ultra soft modal separates, 100% cotton pajamas, and even sexy slips and bralettes. Foyle tells me the brand’s goal is to always create loungewear that feels accessible and easy which is reflected in the brand’s commitment to affordable and size inclusive offerings. “Our goal is to create pieces that support our community in slowing down and recharging, while still feeling confident and comfortable in their own skin,” she says.

If you want to feel like you live in a cottage in the English countryside, Eileen West and Lanz of Salzburg have a large selection of nightgowns in cotton, flannel, and jersey. Hill House Home makes pieces that will look just as chic in bed as they do at brunch; their uber viral nap dress has smocking details that will make it feel as comfy as your favorite pajamas no matter where you where it. Doen makes ethereal nightgowns and separates that would be just at home in a fairytale as they are in your home. If you’re more of a pajama person, Eberjey has a material and a style to suit every preference–their Tencel pajamas are a classic for a reason.